Lumpy Space Princess
Adventure Time fans, break out your lumps! LSP is definitely the sexiest character on this cult-fave cartoon. She loves herself and is an advocate of body confidence. As we all know, nothing is sexier than adamant self love! LSP has that in abundance. She loves her floating, purple, cotton-candy-cloud of a body, and she’s not afraid to let everyone know it! For this costume you’ll need a purple body suit, ideally a large purple foamy blob, and a little yellow star for your forehead. Bonus points if you can master that voice and bounce around all night talking about your lumps!
I went to school in Pittsburgh, where every summer was Anthrocon. What is Anthrocon? The national gathering of furries. Furries are people who dress up in big furry animal suits. Because it’s so hot over the summer, they sometimes wear only the ears and a tail. However, in October it’ll certainly be cool enough for full Disney-character-style coverage. You can be almost anything as a furry! A wolf, a bunny, a penguin, any kind of cat-like creature, or really anything that you come up with on your own. Why is a furry costume “sexy”? Because sometimes (though NOT always, I am not casting judgement on this demographic) being a furry is a sex thing. I am not going to delve further into that, you can do the research on your own. All I’m saying is that you can legitimately call one of these fluffy suits a “sexy costume.”
Beyoncé in the “Partition” Music Video
When I was a kid, I thought that the coolest costume idea ever was to be one of the silhouette dancers from the iPod commercials. Luckily for all of us, there’s a new queen of the silhouette, and she’s the queen that we all can agree on: Yoncé, Queen Bey. If you didn’t almost pass out from the sheer fabulosity of the “Partition” music video, then I suggest you get your pulse checked. As for turning this into a costume, it’s not too different from morphing into an Apple Dancer, or the shadow of Peter Pan, which seems to be gaining popularity. You just need to get one of those full-body spandex suits in black. To Yoncé that shit up, add a black, flippable wig and sky high heels. Bonus points if you bring your own chair to groove on wherever you go!
Here’s one that’s a little tongue-in-cheek. It’s also only a step away from being a furry, so if you want to recycle the fur-suit, you can get several years worth of wear out of this one! In the spirit of pun costumes, you will start out with a regular bunny suit. We’re talking one of those creepy things that hang at the mall and make little children cry around Easter time. Then all you have to do is add some fancy-looking lingerie, and voila! Playboy Bunny! You can add an extra pair of headband ears if you want to get really meta. AND, to give this fur suit another use, slap on a sparkly red dress next year to be Jessica Rabbit! You’re welcome.
Who doesn’t like a MILF joke? Maybe MILFs, actually, but they shouldn’t be offended by this one! All you need to do is create a traditional mummy costume, but only after stuffing your chest and posterior. Make sure that your eyes and lips are visible, plumped, and plumed. Then carry a yoga mat around with you, because attention to detail is what sets the good costumes apart from the history-makers! Bonus points if your date is a DILF, perhaps a DraculaILF or a DemonILF or even a DracoILF, which wouldn’t so much go along with your theme, but would be fun for the Potterheads at your party!
To close, be whatever you want to be this Halloween! Cute and creepy, sexy and scary, covered and coveted, it doesn’t matter! You are not defined by any label and your costume shouldn’t have to have one either <3